You Can't Make Me , Revised and Updated Edition: Strategies for Bringing Out the Best in Your Strong-Willed Child Author: Cynthia Tobias | Language: English | ISBN:
B007PFDPOG | Format: PDF
You Can't Make Me , Revised and Updated Edition: Strategies for Bringing Out the Best in Your Strong-Willed Child Description
“I love the practical strategies and valuable insights from the hearts and lives of strong-willed kids.… You’ll defi nitely want to make this book part of your parenting library.”
—Dr. Kevin Leman, New York Times best-selling author of Have a New Kid by Friday
Turn Conflict into Cooperation Many parents suspect their strong-willed child is deliberately trying to drive them crazy. Difficult to discipline and seemingly impossible to motivate, these children present unique, exhausting, and often-frustrating challenges to the those who love them.
But strong will is not a negative trait. These same children have firm convictions, high spirits, a sense of adventure—all the makings of a great adult. In this book you’ll discover how to channel that passion and determination in positive ways as you build a healthy relationship. Through insights gained from strong-willed people of all ages, you’ll…
· better understand how their minds really work.
· discover positive ways to motivate your strong-willed child.
· learn how to share control without compromising parental authority.
· apply key tactics to survive a meltdown.
· get practical tips for parents who disagree, blended families, and single parents.
Packed with immediately useful strategies to drastically reduce the level of tension in the home (or in the classroom),
You Can’t Make Me shows how you can start today to build a stronger, more positive relationship with your strong-willed child.
Includes…· Top Ten Tips for Bringing Out the Best in a Strong-Willed Child of Any Age
· A Strong-Willed Child Emergency Kit
- File Size: 1236 KB
- Print Length: 194 pages
- Page Numbers Source ISBN: 1578565650
- Publisher: WaterBrook Press; 1 edition (September 18, 2012)
- Sold by: Random House LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B007PFDPOG
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
X-Ray:
- Lending: Not Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #31,148 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
Overall I really liked this book. However, there is one key element I believe is missing, which I will come back to later.
The purpose for this book is to help parents learn to raise their strong-willed children. One thing I got out of this book, which I had not at all expected, was the understanding and realization that I myself was a "strong-willed child" and am still quite the strong-willed person. I'd never really recognized that about myself, because I've always been a generally compliant and submissive person, especially as a child, but this book showed me that being strong-willed is not necessarily about the outward behavior or a pattern of outward defiance. The more I read this book, the more I realized I was reading about myself.
Another thing I found in this book was that nearly all of the suggested parenting strategies are strategies I've already adopted and strive to keep, simply because I try to treat my children the way I myself would like to be treated. It's when I stray from those ideas (usually after being surrounded by ideas in the opposite direction) that my household becomes the most chaotic. One of the things about a SWC (strong-willed child) is that often, punishment backfires and results in a battle of wills. I know this is true for myself-if you try punishment to motivate me, my automatic response is to prove your punishment is not going to work, and as the author states several times, "There is nothing I have to do, except die, which I'm willing to do." I've found this to also be true for my children. I realized a long time ago that taking a mostly non-punitive stance in parenting tended to result in my daughters being far more compliant. It's not about "giving in" or being "permissive", it's about being more creative than punishment.
I've read a lot of parenting books. A lot. I have donated them ALL because, even though they may have had a couple gems of advice, they were mostly inapplicable. It seems like they fell into the categories of being 1)written by someone who didn't have kids with strong wills or didn't remember what it was like when their strong willed kids were young 2) full of super-specific suggestions that worked for their children, as if my kids are exactly the same 3) encourage either an extremely sympathetic and permissive parenting style or a very rigid and authoritative parenting style and (my personal pet peeve) 4) parenting books which are great at describing the problem/issue/behavior needing correction, but lacking any substantial suggestions for resolution. It makes me think: thanks for getting my interest by perfectly describing the personality/circumstance/situation/behavior I'm dealing with and wasting my time by not having any wisdom to share on the matter! (I often wonder if those authors wrote an entire book just to vent, which would be reasonable given the stresses of parenting, but then, please refrain from marketing the book as a useful resources to others.)
You Can't Make Me [But I Can Be Persuaded] by Cynthia Ulrich Tobias is not like any other parenting book I've ever read. I think the main difference is that the author isn't writing based only on personal experience and/or a college education or counseling career. Tobias has literally spoken to thousands of strong willed children (hereafter referred to as SWC) of varying ages and backgrounds. In essence, this book is like a compilation of the useful tips you can find scattered throughout many other bestselling parenting books.
I absolutely love that the tone of this book is positive and encouraging rather than critical.
You Can't Make Me , Revised and Updated Edition: Strategies for Bringing Out the Best in Your Strong-Willed Child Preview
Link
Please Wait...